curtains

Posted in Uncategorized on January 2, 2009 by menagerie

this blog is officially closed and out of business. don’t come back!!

oh btw happy new year😀

3 yr

Posted in Uncategorized on December 10, 2008 by menagerie

F*** the three year rule! If its going to take that long until the next time this happens….I am in for a LONG wait! I need to break the cycle.

new way…

Posted in Uncategorized on December 9, 2008 by menagerie

There is a way out, its quite an obvious one, but something I had never thought about. Its a creative solution to this imbroglio.  It’s execution might take some getting used to, but its better than the alternative.

Slowly, things seem like they will be fine. I will move on. And December might not be that bad !

Posted in Uncategorized on November 30, 2008 by menagerie

I am clueless, I don’t even know why I want to write this. Maybe coz its the first time in several years I cry thinking of Mumbai, not nostalgic tears, but those of utter disgust and pain.

It’s scary, riveting, disgustful, tragic and superbly annoying. How do these kids get brainwashed to such an extent that they feel nothing while executing people cold bloodedly?

20 / 21 yrs … speaking fluent English, wearing a tshirt that says Versace with casual jeans – thats the face of terror now.

I am here, safe, away from home, brain drained, shopping on black friday, partying away..

While Mumbai is trying to slowly stand up on its feet.

she

Posted in Uncategorized on October 25, 2008 by menagerie

She haunts me everywhere. Out of the blue I get a whiff of her and I know she is present in the room. She consumes my thoughts. I don’t know her. I don’t know if she knows me. But we share a piece of common space. Mine in the past, her’s somewhere in that time continuum. She is different each time, different nationalities, different faces, different names.  Yet, each of her challenge me, make me feel like I can never measure up to her.

I try to escape her, try to concede and let her win the battle, but she continually mocks me. It’s the way she stakes her claim.  She seems to own not just what I owned at a point in time, but also me.

She makes me wonder, ‘Am I ever her?’, somewhere to someone. Hopefully even to her!

survival

Posted in Uncategorized on October 24, 2008 by menagerie

 

How does someone who has left, someone who does not exist anymore in your space, still affect so many of your actions?

 

It’s tragic how we let them have that hold. Especially, since when you are in your senses you wouldn’t even consider talking to them let alone cry for them. Is it really them, or is the shattered reflection of us in them that we mourn?

 

Truth denies itself the opportunity to exist. So does sanity. If we were sane all the time, or even truthful, we would be unable to tolerate the pain with which we are afflicted.  So we subdue it, by acts of momentary madness, by happy facades, joyful songs and monetary pleasures. We make believe reality and step over ugly thoughts.

 

It’s a wonder how we move along so effortlessly from life changing events to smaller things which demand our attention. Only humans can misguide themselves that efficiently. It’s good. It’s a matter of survival.

seriously?

Posted in Uncategorized on October 22, 2008 by menagerie

You see what Meiyang Chang does to me? He makes me write shayari, write posts, be happy, forget all the crap happening around me, sing, dance, be interested in literature, be reintroduce to hindi, want to travel……..umm. Oh, ya so here I am again. Third post in the day, whew!

Indian idol this time seems okay, not as awesome as last year. Its still early stages though. The guys are way better than the girls.  Although I miss Mini, how can I complain, when she has been replaced by Meiyang…sigh!

Ahem, the judges are interesting and better. I am glad Kailash replaced Udit, he is more vocal and can stand up to the oh as usual arrogant ‘ I am the best, I am Anu Malik’. And Sonali is one tough woman. She has spunk and I like that. She knows how to use charm when she should to shut her annoying colleagues and she knows when to put up a fight. Javed is as usual, vocal, mainly fair ( except when it had come to Ankita last time around ) and poised.

So we shall see how the season progresses.

I have been missing Grey’s Anatomy and House left right and center. So much to catch up on. How will it all happen. I don’t have a TV. ( Ps: Surefire way to impress me will be buying me a 38 inch LCD HDTV)

I should seriously sleep. Or read. and watch the boys piano round tomorrow………. Who am I kidding?